Comfort zones…you gotta love them. After all, who doesn’t like being in a place where you feel safe and secure? But comfort zones have a downside (or several). While human nature may be to stay some place where things are easy and familiar, there are a lot of important reasons to step outside of the comfort zone and experience new things.
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Stepping Outside The Comfort Zone Is Where You’re Going To Find Opportunities
Great things don’t often just fall into our laps. Instead, they require some work and generally require that we stretch ourselves – either in terms of knowledge, skill, or experience level.
Let’s say, for example, that you’ve got the desire to travel the world and see new places. In order to do thig you’re going to find your comfort zone stretched at lots of levels.
You may have to get comfortable with a mode of travel you’re unaccustomed to. You may need to learn (at least some) new language. You may need to learn to drive on the wrong side of the road (like my mom and I did when we were in Scotland many years ago). You may need to learn to tolerate food and drink that is very different from what you’re used to. And you’ll definitely need to be able to go with the flow when it comes to cultural differences.
This is just one of many examples but the point remains. Most awesome things require some adaptability on our parts.
Stepping Outside The Comfort Zone Is Where You’ll Grow
As much as it may annoy us, most of us aren’t going to find great opportunities for personal growth, job advancement, career achievement, or marvelous adventure while we’re clinging tightly to our comfort zone.
The reason we’re not going to find those things in our comfort zone is because by definition they require something more from us than the average, run-of-the-mill daily efforts.
One of my favorite saying of all time is this:
This is very true when you stop to think about it. After all, unless there’s some compelling reason to change, most of us prefer not to. It’s just too easy to maintain the status quo and let things continue as they are.
And I’m guilty of this myself…more than I’d like to admit.
I’ve stayed in job situations that weren’t ideal. I’ve let others “guide” my decisions to the point where I was doing what I was told more than actually thinking for myself. I’ve stubbornly hung on to situations and circumstances because I was afraid of what it would cost me to give them up.
My stubbornness has too often been to my own detriment.
And more times than not, I didn’t – or wouldn’t – change until something got to the point where it was truly too painful or costly to continue.
Life has definitely had to kick my rear end a few times in order to get me to move.
So what change needs to be made in your life that you’ve been putting off because it’s easier to just ignore it?
The problem with this approach is that either we ignore it until it (whatever “IT” is) becomes too big to ignore any more (which often means something has become critical), or that we end up becoming numb to an issue that isn’t good for us.
You Learn What You’re Really Made Of Outside The Comfort Zone
Here’s something fiendish about comfort zones, as long as we remain in one, we may think we’re capable of something…but we can’t know for sure.
For example, how many times have you heard someone say, “I could write a book like that”?
I’ve heard this frequently, as has anyone else who writes. Because it’s easy for those who don’t write to assume it’s easy. After all, anyone who can – and does -read books, generally does so effortlessly. Books are supposed to flow seamlessly from the beginning to the end without anything harder on the part of the reader than to merely sit still and focus long enough to get through the book.
And since it READS easily, people assume that the writing was easy as well. From that, it’s easy to assume that since writing is obviously easy, everyone assumes they can do it to.
As someone who finished the first draft of her first novel last year, I can tell you that it definitely is not easy.
Again, this is just one example. But until someone actually tries something, it’s easy to assume (from the safety of the comfort zone) that they’re capable. Until we take a step outside our comfort zone and give something a try, we’re making what may be false assumptions about our abilities.
However, the converse is also true.
It’s possible to think that we’re not capable of something only to find out that we are once we try. Most people are capable of much more than they think and it’s only fear that keeps them from trying.
Stepping outside the comfort zone and giving something our best effort (while taking learning time and practice into consideration) is the only way we can know for sure what our true talents and abilities are.
We may be pleasantly surprised if we just give ourselves the chance.
Our Pride Grows Outside The Comfort Zone
You’ve probably noticed that the times when people really feel proud of themselves, is when they’ve done or achieved something new.
None of us feel a sense of pride when we do something ordinary (or ordinary for us, anyway). Ordinary is expected. It’s the norm. It’s what we simply expect from ourselves because we know it’s what we’re capable of.
But doing something new…now that’s something to be proud of.
If you’re not feeling some pride regularly, perhaps that’s a sign that you need to stretch yourself and try something new. We all thrive and feel better about ourselves when we can feel pride (and I don’t mean the boastful “I’m so great” kind of pride that’s common in narcissist) and that comes from achieving something.
Does every achievement have to be at the level of earth changing?
Absolutely not.
Achievements come in all shapes and sizes, just like people.
If you’re not techy and you learn a new tech skill – that’s an achievement.
If you can’t draw a straight line with a ruler and you work up the courage to take an art class and learn some techniques – that’s an achievement.
The point is that you don’t have to do something earth shattering in order to stretch yourself and grow. Any new skills you learn are a step in the right direction.
We Can Only Become More Courageous Outside The Comfort Zone
Here’s an mindset issue that prevents many people from venturing outside their comfort zones: they think they need courage before then can try something different.
And so they stay in the comfort zone waiting for courage to magically appear before they’ll take a step out.
But courage isn’t something that magically appears.
Courage is something that we develop as we take risks and try new things. It’s generally the result of taking action rather than the cause.
However, this doesn’t mean that we can’t do some mind work in order to work up our courage…or to work up the nerve to try something before we think we’re really ready.
My nana used to call this “gumption” or “moxie”. And while if you look up the definition of either word you’ll find reference to courage, Nana always used the words as synonyms for working up your nerve.
Sometimes we all need to give ourselves a good talking to in order to work up our nerve and give something a try even though we’re unsure about the outcome.
“What generally holds us back…is us!”
Outside The Comfort Zone Is Where We Develop Confidence
Once we’ve worked up our nerve and tried something new, our self-confidence increases.
And generally, we try something new and we don’t fall totally flat on our face. We experience at least some success. At the very least, we learn something from the experience that we can then apply and use later.
This gives us the confidence to try again.
We learn that we’re capable of more than we initially gave ourselves credit for. and figure out that we aren’t the helpless, hopeless creatures we thought. And as we build new skills and confidence, we find it easier to try the next new thing. Our confidence and courage grow together in tandem.
Stepping Outside Your Comfort Zone Is Cause For Celebration
We need more celebration in our lives. But too often we sell ourselves short and don’t celebrate when we learn, experience, or do something new.
This needs to stop!
There’s nothing wrong – or arrogant or conceited – with taking a moment or two to recognize when you’ve done something worth noting.
And learning new skills, developing confidence and courage, and achieving new things are definitely milestones in a person’s life.
So enjoy the moment. Feel some price. Celebrate your “gumption”. And then take the next step…after all, you know you can do it.
For more information about dealing with and escaping your comfort zone, check out this book The Comfort Zone: Create a Life You Really Love With Less Stress and More Flow by Kristen Butler
More before you go:
I help older women get past their fear and mindset issues so they can create a plan to pursue their goals and dreams.
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